John Mayer, I can help you!!!!!!

What has happened to the love of my life? Since fourth grade, I have had an unnatural obsession with John Mayer that has only gotten worse with time. I thought my life was over when I found out that my sensitive, witty pop/rock god was with Jessica Simpson. I mean, Jessica Simpson? I don't care how beautiful she is how can you even stand to be around someone that stupid?? Anyway, that relationship ended with John Mayer publicly dissing Ms. Simpson. And I thought to myself, "Thank you Jesus, you just saved John Mayer from certain death." After Jessica, John dated some other people nothing major and then he met Jennifer Aniston. First of all, she's ten years older than him. I mean I don't have anything wrong with that big of an age difference as long as the man is older than the woman (ahem Hugh Laurie and I lol), call me old-fashioned. I wasn't worried though because John is a player to say the least and Jennifer Aniston's biological clock has become a ticking time bomb, making her extremely clingy, something John Mayer doesn't need. Yet, the relationship grew and I started to worry with news in the air of a backyard wedding, etc. Finally though that relationship has flown down the pipes. Jennifer and John have split, but the split hasn't exactly been clean. You see, John siad that he broke up with Jennifer because they were, "at different places in their lives", yet Jennifer is saying that she is the one who ended it because John cheated. All I can say is this, John Mayer needs to stop dating celebrities and remain a bachelor for the rest of his life. Hey, it's worked for George Clooney thus far. But this is beside the point, no the main reason for this blog post is John Mayer's new look. One word: EWWWW!!! Okay, so maybe that isn't really a word but that's the only way I can describe the new buff, crew cut John Mayer. It saddens me... Dear John Mayer, the fans miss the old you!!!! :(